Some Kind Of Nightmare: Molly Mess!

An Interview with Molly Mess conducted by Charlie Fuchs

I was granted the privilege of being able to interview the amazing, talented and inspiring woman Molly Mess from Some Kind of Nightmare; my former band Punge was lucky enough to open for them in 2015 at Copper Top Dive-N- Dine in Huntsville, Alabama. In this interview Molly shares with us the story of how Some Kind of Nightmare was formed, the ups and downs that they have gone through, including her truly inspiring battle with Breast Cancer. I'm extremely proud to say she kicked cancer's ass! I'm so very grateful to Molly and the band for allowing me to interview them and want to thank them for such a great opportunity! I asked some pretty personal questions, Molly gracefully answered them all and this is what she had to say:

"Some Kind of Nightmare started in 2006. I was in need of starting a punk band. I found a bass player and we were in search of a guitarist and a drummer. My husband, Chy (we were dating at that time) had just lost his singer from his old band, and he and the drummer were looking for a singer and a bassist. I didn't want to unite the two entities together at first because the singer was his brother and had not left on good terms. But it was our first bass player who suggested to "join forces." Chy seemed pretty open to the idea, so I went with it. We didn't become a three piece until sometime in 2012. I picked up the bass when we were sick of not being able to tour due to members.

Well, starting in 2013, tour life became our home life. We started touring full time. We were on the road for a full year that year. We took a few months off in 2014 in Arizona, and went back out on the road until June of 2015. I was diagnosed with breast cancer in July of 2015, two days before we were supposed to leave for the next tour.

Meeting the wonderful people we have met on the road has been my favorite part of touring. It's been truly amazing in that sense. We get to play our creations every night. It's very therapeutic. Exploring the country has been incredible. The whole experience is really eye opening. We've learned so very much from this lifestyle. We've learned how to become very resourceful. Vehicle problems is the thing I hate worst about tour. Those moments can be some of the toughest.

Some of our musical inspirations include Rancid, Black Flag, Bad Brains, Minor Threat, OFF, Betty Blowtorch, Butt Trumpet, The Gits, Naked Raygun, The Distillers. Also some of the bands that we've met on the road: Suburban Vermin, Kill Liberal, Cuntalopes, We Might Be Wasted, OC45, Rude-A-Baga, and No Brainer.

I was diagnosed with breast cancer at the age of 29. There was a "debate" between my surgeon and my oncologist. My surgeon said stage II, because a lymph node was cancerous. My oncologist said stage IB because of the size of the lymph node.

It was terrifying. I was very angry it happened when it did, not angry about having it, because it's a common disease, but when it happened it really upset me. We had been offered to do a small tour with Michael Graves, we were about to have a meeting with Pig Records from Seattle. We had booked an awesome tour with some really great shows. Everything had to be canceled. I felt horrible for our drummer (who was living in Texas and was preparing for the tour.) It was hard having everything we worked for ripped from us because of me. There was a lot of guilt. Chy was so very supportive. The best and number one husband ever! When we announced the diagnosis, so many bands and people across the country started putting together benefit shows. One of our Arizona friends came to visit us. That's where the true strength came from I believe. All of the support. I started really exercising, walking, running, Yoga, Pilates, etc. I had watched an interview with a breast cancer survivor saying that exercise increases survival rate by 50%. I started going to an amazing church within walking distance from my house. The pastor came to both of my surgeries. I'm so grateful for all of the support I had. But Chy truly got me through it.

Bandwise, everything had to be put on hold. Our drummer understood completely. In fact, everyone understood completely. Our drummer held out for us and I'm grateful for that.

I don't know what the hardest part was. So many things made it difficult. Canceling the tour and not being able to play music. Losing both of my breasts. (I did get reconstruction.) Chemo and the pain that comes with it was terrible, and I wasn't even on the harsh chemo. My heart goes out to anyone on what they call the "red devil" There were a few moments where I thought that I was going to die. It was really hard hearing stories from people about people they knew who had died from cancer. The death of one of my friends from cancer has been hard. There might be some survivor's guilt there. There's post treatment depression, no one really warns you about. Certain people not being as supportive as you expected them to be. All of the changes your poor body has to conquer. Definitely low self esteem issues. It's all been tough, but I'm so glad I got to experience it because of what I've learned and the insight cancer has given me.

To all men and women out there! Complete self examinations weekly. A diagnosis isn't an instant death sentence. You'll learn you have strength you never knew existed. I love my mastectomy and my scars. I love my new breasts, so there can be positive body image after a mastectomy. If you have tissue expanders, they are magnetic, so have a little fun and put magnets on your boobs. If you have a certain type of breast implants, they are see through if you shine a flashlight on them. Always laugh. Always. Take care of your body. Treat it like gold, because it's worth your life.

One last thing, plan on surviving."

Again, I would like to thank Molly and Some Kind of Nightmare for such an awesome interview, my first for the Gadzine, as well as Adam Harmless for allowing me to write the article. Keep an eye out for Some Kind of Nightmare as they are on tour at the moment. They're an incredibly high energy punk band that will not leave you disappointed, so if you can make it out to their show I highly recommend going to rock out with them!

Interview by Charlie Fuchs

[originally appeared in GAD! Zine Issue 12]